Dialogue at the Table
‘'The art of homemaking is not nearly appreciated enough. There are many who make homes, but not as many are able to create a welcoming harbor. A place where people, lost, wandering, in love, living, find comfort and nourishment to sustain themselves out in the world, on their own. Both my grandmothers were true homemakers. It's often the grandmother who is the glue that holds everyone together and whose soup is unlike any other. They know everyone's secrets but never tell a soul. They listen more than they talk, but when they do talk, it's a simple matter of innate wisdom. Maybe because they have slowed down enough and been through it all. It's often our grannies and nanas that take on what you bring them and filter out all of the dirt and the distracting pulp and pour out to their guests the essence of life. Connection, love, feeling at home. They cater to homeostasis with oneself, people and places. It's what I dream of growing into one day. I want to give others what I have always longed for, a safe space to unapologetically be all of you.’’
- An excerpt of AnOther Journal: a private diary for my loved ones.
I’ve been hosting themed dinners called Dialogue at the Table. We gather with a small group of people to discuss one subject. Sharing thoughts and philosophies on a matter that every single person at the table has a deep-felt connection with.
Our shared interest on the subject is the glue that brings the guests from all walks of life together. I find it wondrous how easily unfamiliar faces feel held enough by each other to share what's behind the formalities of:
"How are you?"
"Oh great, busy! You?"
"Fine, thanks! Let's catch up for coffee soon."
"Will do."
A coffee date that might or might not happen and will mostly conclude discussing short term topics, the troubles of work/life balance, but rarely give the room to find out what's behind it all. What is truly missing or what is a lingering longing that's being ignored because of doubt? I’ve been reading how the demand for therapists keeps rising, when we don't need therapists on speed dial every time we feel a little blue, unsure or uncomfortable. We need to talk and listen to others with the intention to go beyond the mundane, "how are you's" and "what's happening lately." But for conversations to go further than their familiar routine the scene and setting need to hold space for it to unfold.
In this day and age where we all long for that long ago 'village' to raise a child or ‘community’ to feel a sense of belonging to something bigger, who could've imagined a single dinner could do that trick? It takes you out of your daily routine and for 3 or 4 hours you're deeply connected to strangers who, as you will soon find out, have many similarities, and when supper is done, everyone goes back to their individual lives, but this time knowing there are many interesting people, stories, experiences and connections to be discovered out there.
I am planning to host many more editions of Dialogue at the Table to discuss philosophies on life, friendships, creativity, literature, illness, the body, feminism and the list goes on. Rereading my diary entry reminded me: this is the space I want to hold for others. Hosting Dialogue at the Table is nothing more than homemaking, a temporary home that is. And as I wrote in my journal it is one of the things I want to mature into.
Hope to see you soon!
Love always,
